Grief

Grief is the acute pain that accompanies loss.

Because grief obeys its own trajectory, there is no timetable for feelings of pain after loss; nor is it possible to avoid suffering altogether. In fact, attempts to suppress or deny grief are just as likely to prolong the process, while also demanding additional emotional effort. (source: Grief | Psychology Today)

Some examples include: 

• The end of a relationship
• A move to a new community
• A much-anticipated opportunity or life goal is suddenly closed to us
• The death of a pet
• Someone we love contracts a potentially life-threatening illness

Experiencing grief can feel like: 

• Difficulty concentrating
• Apathy
• Anger—at those responsible, at the deceased, at ourselves, at God, at any handy target
• Guilt—”If only I had done. . .”
• Sleep disturbances
• Loss of appetite
• Withdrawal from others
• Irritability
• Intense sadness or tears when a memory is triggered
• Numbness
• Loneliness, or a sense of separateness from others
• Loss of life’s meaning

Active, healthy grieving requires balance—balancing the time you spend directly working on your grief with the time you spend coping with your day-to-day life; balancing the amount of time you spend with others with the time you spend alone; balancing seeking help from others with caring for yourself. Focusing too strongly on any single side of these pairings is getting off-track.

Resources for Grief

• Grief Share groups
• COVID Grief Network
• Grief Support for Suicide Loss
• Mindfulness and Grief
• Modern Loss

Videos:

We don't "move on" from grief. We move forward with it | Nora McInerny